the vanished chidhood

SEPTEMBER, 2004....
It was september and i left kota and went to delhi. As my maama hav some sources i got admission in the middle of the session..,though it was not a best of schoools , but it hardly matters when there is no option left.
Ma sis and i got the admission in same school, where my cousins are already studying. As days past, i am getting more frustated and upset from my life.. The diffrences started occuring, i was a kid and i felt that these diffrences should not be done with me and ma sis and ma cousins.. At the starting i got lots of days at which i only cried.., and just keep remembring ma mum.., you can think a child  who didnt left her mum for a sec.., would have what feeling at that time... I became a frustated kid who had lost his childhood , and also having a sister behind him.., who hardly knows that what a big thing happened to her..  I just started to abuse with maama n maami.., and started feeling lonely..
but as time passed i was getting used to it..., but i was alwazz there for my sis.., and wanna see her happy.
Ma as well as ma sis's childhood vanished, all the branded clothes which we used to wear had turned  out in ordinary ones..., we used to use the latest thing in trend , was ruined in a cloth per 2 mnth buying...,but i won't say that there was maama or maami's fault.., in there family 2 more family members added now..and they are also a middle class family..., so have to go acoording to that...
At first ma sis became so matured.., and just suffostacated..  I was so worried about but itz our circumstances...
Anywaz soon we both adjusted in the school, but at home itz becoming more difficult day by day.. Once dinner was ready and i just got there as maami called me.."Sahil take your dinner".., i went there and just saw a DAAL, which i donnt like at all..., i cried"I won't eat this one". As our mother cook the food which we both eat happpily and know our likes and dislikes very well(as mom is only the person who knows you very well), we dont have the habbit tyo eat the food which we don't like. Then maami said."You have to eat what is cooking., you are not special" and then i have no option left other then eating. I ate the food but cried more than that. At those days i just keep cursing the god alot.., and became a non-follower of him.I was quite intelligent at that time., as i belong to education city kota.. So i just taken interest in studies right from the beginning. I  just challenged the toppers of the class from the first day, as x-ams were about to start and i have to complete ma work also.., and whith no use of any sense of mine i just challenged them. X-AMS came and i got 77% at that time in 7th class.., which was not accepted by me at any cost..The class toppers laughed at me and insulted me. But i never lost hopes.., it was 8th now.., i m with the most happening group of the class, which have all the members included in it..,PADAKU, NALAYAK, MAST, OR HARAAMI, and we used to enjoy alot. We were back benchers and keep the teachers on there toes always..... With those frnds life is seeming little-bit easy.. At that time i used to be very fatty, i lost ma weight in six months and became sleeky guy.. It's not because i worked out so hard., it's because there no more mum's love and no more happiness in ma lif.. But i just tried to liv ma lif again as i hav no other option left.. At that time i used to think that people say that god do all the things for your goodness, "but what good he will do by taking ma mum and dad away from me...".  But anyways, after becoming sleeky.., i used to luk more handsome. And then all the girls are just started taking interest in me.
But ma concentration is on studies this time., and FIRST TERM strated and i just ranked third in those X-AMS.. Now all toppers became red as tomato.., and became concious..(do not underestimate anybody).
Then as i counted in the toppers, ma class teacher appointed me as a monitor, with MANISHA the girl, i got ma first crush on, though m in 8th that time.., but it doesnt matter as love has no age. I was very happy at that time that being a monitor i would spent more time with her. But ma friends, who hav the 2nd importance in ma life after ma sis., i gave them more time. They used to tease me alot with manisha's name.., and i got shy. Now 2nd terms came, this time i got competition from 4 persons, from which 3 were of my group, so i have to be above of all those. Manisha was a top ranker, then payal was 2nd one.., and i got the third place.., again. As ma fast friend got 5th, i felt bad for him, but he just got more jealous from me and left talking with me. I havn't bothered thst as it is human nature.... Once we are at backbenchers n our KHADUS Preeti mam, hindi teacher entered.."Goodmorning class" she roared.. "Goodmorning mam" we replied frightenedly. "Take out your books, and start writing" she ordered like a hitler. As we are backbenchers, itz our duty , not to follow her. So we didn't. She got busy with her work and our group got split in gossipping section. As i am busy talking to ma frnd and taking tips for manisha, she saw me busy talking and called me up" You there come out with your copy". I was shocked and stasrting thinking what to do, then i used very old one"Sorry mam". But she continue "No comeout". I just got out with ma copy. "Show me your work, i know you havn't completed it yet" she cried. At this timne i love to be quite intelligent as i completed ma work, so i went to her with full confidence and stood still (like roaring comeon you hitler wanna fight, now u gonna loose it). As she put up the scale to beat me up, i stopped her "Mam first see that  wheather ma work is complete or not".
She snathched ma copy and began turning pages.........., then saurprised and said "You completed your work". Her eyes became as large as 10rs coin. She put her scale down staring at me as, she love me as her dinner.. Whole of the  class began laughing.. Her face was gone whole red like a pig.. At the same time the conditions in the home were not getting better. The conflicts between me n mami were reaching at the peak as the days are passing. So, i began spending ma time out of house morem, rather than to be in house and let ma brain be cooked up. At the first day i got out of ma house, to make freinds there. They were playing cricket, and all are small then me in age. But, i used to be very shy and coward, at that time..
So, i asked hesisating "Can i play with you". After all it was DELHI,  n i was from kota. They think for a while, and said "Ok, but you can be unpire only". I felt littlebit of  guilty, that these kidds are maikng me umpire, but then i think that it is suiting ma personality, as i was so fatty. So i agreed. After few days they became frank, and i just joined there group. And then a new stage of life had started.